Originally Posted by Karen 5th October 2005


How do you think Hornby did as an author and teacher in telling a moving story about suicide?

Have you been affected by a suicide?

Jae


It is definitely an uncomfortable subject matter and I was rather hesitant on reading it. Adding a book about suicide on top of the climate in our country...and well, I just wasn't so sure about embarking upon it. But I wanted to participate in the discussion as well as support my favorite actor's work/interest. So I read it and I was quickly captivated by the characters and intrigued about how they got to the tower block and then survived to tell the story. It was pretty clear from the beginning that they "didn't go through with it" and were re-telling their stories...so I was relieved. It become safe to like the characters. I didn't want to be set up to grieve the loss of a character. I have to say, that I didn't completely trust this with Hornby...I kept thinking there would be a twist and something might happened to one of them. But I remained attached to the characters and intrigued as to how they were going to "come down off of this". That is when I realize the book wasn't so much about suicide...as it was about overcoming despair. It became more of a story about support, kinship and healing than suicide. So I was right there routing them on wishing I could put my touch in the story...and then during one of their gatherings, they did actually watch a man jump. That drove it home to me that Hornby's subject matter was alive and well. The scene of that man's eyes as he leaped haunted me for days. How fragile that window is....

I liked the ending...that everyone did not just go off and live "happily ever after" but came to a point in their lives that it was okay to go on to work on their issues and problems. They decided to "show up for life" with warts and all. I liked that. I am glad he did not go off into some grandiose fairy tale ending of mass proportion. I like that the characters ended up where they should have been before being derailed by the pre-occupation of suicide and were right there in the middle of the road dealing with their lives. Right there...where we all are every day...dealing with the ups, the downs and the fumbles.

Karen


My cousin committed suicide years ago and no one in our family was ever the same. It destroys each and ever family member. I thought he did a good job in telling everyone's story and making us see them through their eyes.

Jae


I am so sorry Karen. I am so very sorry...it makes my heart sad that you had to endure such an experience.

Karen


Thanks so much, I was about 16.

Her death still haunts my aunt and my cousin.

MerryK

It does feel that way to me too... more about despair. I caught myself just quick enough to not read about the ending.

Karen~ I'm sorry for the tragic loss that your family experienced.

This was a tough one too for me to reply too. I lost my brother when I was 12.. he was 18.. it was ruled a suicide .. was in the papers.. it was a very very unusual and tragic incident... and just thinking on this has thrown me right back there. Yes.. the impact it makes on a family is unbelievable..you are forever changed. I will never forget that morning.. it was devasting.

Karen


I'm so sorry to hear that MK. I can't even begin to imagine how this loss affected you and your family. My heart breaks for the ones left behind. And for those that the lack of hope took away.

I think this was a difficult book to read and an even more difficult one to discuss.

Deppraved


I can think of nothing so devasting as losing a loved one to suicide, I imagine it to be even more traumatic than murder; at least you have someone other than the loved one on which to vent your wrath and grief. I have several clients who have had a loved one commit suicide. I don't know how they managed to cope; it's too painful and I try not to bring it up.

I have not been so unfortunate. My heart goes out to you, MerryK and Karen.